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How Building EQ Skills Can Make You a Better Leader

Photo by Mimi Thian on Unsplash

Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is a proven foundation for key capabilities that drive success in our increasingly complex world of work, and especially the evolving role of leaders. Team leaders and managers at all levels need to be both caring coaches and strategic decisions makers, adept at leading change, fostering collaboration and mastering critical conversations in fast-paced and rapidly shifting environments. It’s important to acknowledge the huge range of strengths and activities this requires and support people leaders with the right development to get there.

EQ is different than personality type or cognitive ability (IQ). It is a set of skills, attitudes and behaviours that helps us understand who we are, what we put out in the world, how we navigate our experiences with others and handle what life throws our way. Focusing on strengthening EQ skills, building new habits and leveraging these behaviours to improve the quality of conversations can help team leaders develop more connected, capable and well-performing teams. Well-performing teams (vs.“high-performing”) maximize individual and collective strengths as well as team well-being.

There are many leadership activities where EQ can make an impact, but a few key areas below can be important as we head into the future of work.

Self-confidence

Building up EQ practices can help with how we see ourselves in the world, creating a fuller picture of our strengths and weakness. By noticing and naming the good and the bad (ok even the ugly), we can learn to accept it, respect it and set more useful goals for learning and growth. We get better at noticing situations where we naturally feel more successful and better understand how to develop areas we want to strengthen. Instead of getting caught in a trap of self-doubt or self-defeat, we can focus energy on the things that are aligned with who we really are which helps boosts both confidence and competence.

The current pace of change means people are rising faster into leadership roles with less time to cultivate all their skills in advance. Leaders who build their EQ skills are better at knowing who they are, what they offer as well as where they struggle. They can lead more authentically by expressing themselves more clearly and they are more likely to set themselves up for success by effectively enlisting the talents and skills of those around them, whether its delegating to their team or collaborating with their peers.

Decision Making

Recognizing when emotions are involved in our decisions and not just our rational thoughts, and how these emotions influence our decisions is a critical skill and huge advantage in most areas of our life, whether it’s at home, deciding what to make for dinner or game-changing decisions at work. Developing our EQ can help us recognize when emotional information will be helpful for making decisions or when we tend to get caught up in “analysis paralysis.” We get better at noticing when our biases might be at play and anticipate how decisions might affect others, which can help us create better solutions.

Leaders who focus on building their EQ skills understand when their own emotions are involved in decisions and can appreciate the emotions of other people at the table, which makes it easier to facilitate discussion, consensus building and agreement. They can view a problem with multiple lenses and consider more creative solutions which can be applied to many decisions, from determining which new service you’ll offer your customers to hiring the next new team member.

Coaching

Strengthening EQ skills like interpersonal relationships and empathy can help us develop mutually beneficial relationships, and help us get better at noticing and listening to what’s happening with others - what they might be experiencing, their hopes and dreams. EQ also helps us make the most of our flexibility and optimism to find positive and creative ways to develop other’s skills and to express feedback clearly and respectfully to support their learning.

Leaders can use EQ skills to engage in meaningful dialogue with their team members, provide real-time feedback and develop creative assignments that enhance capacity while increasing individual responsibility and accountability. EQ can help leaders listen and get to know their team members as whole people. They will understand what drives their team not just at work but out in the world too and help them make the most of what they have to offer.

Inspiring Others

EQ elements like social responsibility, emotional expression and empathy impact the way we communicate, how well we understand others and even how we measure success. Building EQ can help us find the balance between inspiring yet realistic goals, help us communicate about goals clearly, recognize when someone on the team needs support, and how to offer it in helpful ways.

Leaders can use EQ to improve their ability to communicate with vision and purpose and connect more personally with their team which leads to increased trust and better insights from the team. This can lead to a better sense of how to meaningfully articulate the “what” and the “why” of the team’s work in ways that resonate more deeply with the team.

Resilience

The ability or tendency to monitor and adjust when our bodies and minds are under stress is a key element of emotional intelligence. Strengthening our EQ skills helps us notice what emotions we are having, what they feel like in our body, and what they are connected to. EQ skills also help us recognize our level of flexibility, enhance our optimism, and keeps us more aware of situations that trigger strong emotional expression giving us opportunities to build new habits and more helpful responses.

Leaders who leverage EQ Skills can be proactive in managing the impact of stress over the long-term. They are able to sustain their optimism in the face of set-backs and keep others focused on the positive. They acknowledge challenges while offering meaningful support and fostering greater resilience in others. 

Where to Start?

This is only a handful of ways that EQ skills can be applied to daily interactions and core capabilities. There’s very little about leading teams that isn’t impacted by EQ and connection skills. All development starts with building self-awareness and a great way to do this is with the EQ-i 2.0 Assessment - one of the only scientifically validated instruments available.

Like most assessment tools, the EQ-i 2.0 is a catalyst for curiosity. While the results are robust, they are less about getting finite answers, and more about knowing where to start asking questions so you can create your intentions for action to support your EQ skill building and overall leadership journey.

Curious to learn more? Check out our next open session:

The Vibrant Leader: Better Conversations. Brighter Results.

Starting April 22 with 4 interactive sessions and more than 8 weeks of supported practice you’ll get a deep understanding of emotional intelligence then develop and apply your EQ skills by building strong connection habits, greater capabilities as a manager, and conversations that count.

Early Bird registration (over 30% savings!) ends March 22.

Sources:

  • Stein, S. (2017). The EQ Leader: Instilling Passion, Creating Shared Goals and Building Meaningful Organizations Through Emotional Intelligence. Hoboken: John Wiley & Sons Inc.

  • MHS (Multi-Health Assessments Inc.)

  • Inc.com: This Study of 300,000 Leaders Revealed the Top 10 Traits for Success (Peter Economy March 30 2018)